This morning I was reading a job search article which noted some advice from the author of a book called Be Fearless.
Write out a list of all the skills and qualities that got you to where you are. Own them!
I shuddered a bit. He meant, of course, to give readers a way to shore themselves up so they could face future challenges. But, I couldn't help but see it differently.
What skills and qualities have gotten me to a point where I'm unhappy with my career, social life, finances and personal development?
You noticed, I hope, that those are some major life areas. Almost all of them, in fact. It's not good. For every step forward I feel myself sliding backward into an abyss of my own making. The key for me is always fear. It's played a major role in every decision and non-decision of my teen and adult life.
The question, as always, is how do I fight it? How, without the therapy and drugs I can't afford anyway, do I stare fear down and tell it to fuck off?
We know what Nike has been telling us for decades, but when you're racked with anxiety it's hard to even consider beginning something that freaks you out. I'm clearly more afraid of change than I am of dying with things staying the same. Why? Why do I allow it to have such a hold over my life?
Maybe it doesn't matter. Maybe I need to let go of my analytical crutch and just Do My Opposite. Say hello to that cool looking person in Panera. Make that cold call. Introduce myself via email to that author. Research that idea. Face the blank page and start writing that story down. Send that script off to agents. Go left when I'd usually go right. Say yes when I would normally say no for no good reason.
Today I'm going to begin to consciously Do My Opposite. Because, this isn't good enough.
How do you become fearless in life?
3 comments:
I don't think fear ever goes totally away, but by literally forcing ourselves to do what we fear, the emotion lessens. Fear can get the best of us if we let it, so I like your idea to "just do the opposite."
Hi Citygirlusa,
to console me of my fear about the darkness of the nights in the village, my brother told me. "Everybody has some kind of fear. Even the strongest looking person is afraid of something. But, they just do what is to be done, even though they are scared." He also told me, he himself was scared of darkness. But, go into the dark by feeling that fear and nothing happened.
I am glad that you are going to do the opposite of what the scared mind tells you.
So what did you did today, to be on top of the world?
Fear is a four letter word. If you can follow your own advice, you will find a way. There are times fear grips me in it jaws. It has the possibility of paralyzing me. But then I realize I am in control of my life, no one else than the grip eases and then fear is gone. Keep the faith in yourself. Susan Cooper
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