Monday, April 06, 2009
Revelation
I was reading this today and I think I had a breakthrough.
Maybe I can't find a job because that's not what I want. I had "a job" and hated it for 8 of the 9 years and 5 months I was there - no matter what I did. I left that place because I wanted more than just "a job." I wanted to enjoy my work. I wanted to actually use my brain and talents. I wanted freedom. I wanted better money for work I enjoyed and couldn't wait to do.
So, if this is my block to finding work, what does it mean? We need money, another real income, but I will never be happy with "a job." What do I do? Do I stop praying for exactly the thing I don't want (because the Universe knows I don't really want it anyway)? Do I go back to praying for meaningful work I can enjoy? Even if it means I don't work again for another year?
What the hell do I do???
Labels:
answers,
dammit,
fuck,
hating work,
life stuff,
money woes,
reading,
realizations,
this is me
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