Monday, June 06, 2011

Are You There God? It's Me, Citygirl...



Dear Almighty,

I'm writing this as an open prayer. To get it all out and force myself to stop.

We cannot worry anymore. HUBS and I cannot sleep at night. We're snappy and bitchy and twitchy and irritable. Even when we're happy we're sad. It all feels like too much; like a dreary dead end that we can't turn around from.

And we're trying. Trying to stop the worry, the ruminating, the wallowing, the stressing, the fear. We are: breathing deeply, counting to 10, praying, pleading, meditating, yoga-ing, stretching and discussing. It helps for a bit, and then feels meaningless.

So, I'm now (actively and publicly) giving it all to you. Surrendering every fear, stress, worry, anxiety and its ilk.

About...

Luanne's health issues
My joblessness
My depression
My restlessness
My inactivity
My indecision
My procrastination
HUBS' exhaustion
Our money problems
Our anger
Our anxiety
Our fear of our own futures
Our lack of hope
Our lack of complete faith
Our entitlement
Our reckless desires...

And all the other negative, scary stuff.

I ask that you take these things and help us figure out a way through, up, over, around or under them. And if we can't figure out a way, please help us somehow be ok anyway.

Many thanks,
XO

Citygirl

1 comment:

SoMuchSugar said...

Sometimes it helps me to make a list of all the good stuff too... I know what the anxiety is like though that keeps you up at night. I hope you can get through this week better.

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