You know how the boyfriend is currently pre-employed? Well he was finally forced into telling his parents about the situation last week. I understood him being reluctant to give up such depressing info, but when you go from talking about work A LOT to never saying a peep about it, well, the ma and the pa are going to notice.
He had a long, frustrating conversation with them on Wednesday night. We were in Quick Trip, actually, and he elected to continue talking in the store, which trapped us there for about a half hour as he fumed silently while my black cherry slush got melty. His issues? The parents think they have to know all the details of his life even though he's out of their house and 35-years-old, they have made him feel guilty about career missteps in the past, they seem to not quite trust him to handle his life (especially where money and naughty pre-marital sex are concerned), they lob woulda-shoulda-coulda at him when he needs support, and he hates lying but feels bad enough already without their needling so he muddies his conscience to keep it at bay.
Oh yeah. Those issues? Not really with the whole parental unit. They are just with his mom. Oy vey, y'all.
The result of that talk was him agreeing to us having dinner with them the next evening. Which was fine and all, except how was he going to keep their work questions at bay FACE TO FACE? It was impossible enough over the phone. Long story short, he didn't have to. I came in the next day while a tense conversation with the ma was going on. Turns out she called him and got right to the point, asking if he wasn't working anymore. He couldn't take all the lying so he gave it up (after three valiant efforts to retain the secrecy).
I have to say, THANK FUCKING GOD. Do you have any idea, internet, how difficult it was to try to bolster him all alone? How deeply hard it was to keep my mouth shut about his pre-employed status to everyone? How sad, angry and depressed I've seen him? I mean, I love him, and I'm helping him as much as I can, but I can only do so much. It's going to be so much easier for him now that his parents know and ma's not freaking out. Again, I really get that he wanted to just bring up the whole mess after getting another good gig, but it's been over a month. It was becoming obvious to me that they were going to figure things out. And THANK YOU, THANK YOU JESUS that they didn't lay any guilt trips on him or supply him with solutions he's thought of and tried a hundred times over already. HE WOULD HAVE EXPLODED. Right there at dinner. In the Steak-n-Shake. Messy, messy, messy.
And the weird part? His mom proposed to me. I guess she was so impressed with my stick-to-itiveness in regards to his pre-employment that she felt the need to bring up marriage. I said yes. It would have been rude to ignore her, right?
2 comments:
Congratulations and How freakin funny! Its always good to at least have the future MIL on your side, b/c half the time it seems like you are marrying her anyway with the way they tend to want to keep their noses in your biz. I loved my ex-Mil so i'm not complaining. Congrats all the same.
Thanks soac! Now we need two things: to decide ourselves that it's time to get hitched, and a good solid job for the boy. Then, we're set =D
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