Showing posts with label medical mind fucks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label medical mind fucks. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

That Feels Good



So, I did what I said I was going to do and went to an allergist last Friday. I have to say, it was one of the most pleasant doctor visit experiences I've ever had.

Luckily, I was able to find someone who takes our insurance and has an office that's about five minutes away from our house. She was just really nice and patient. She listened to everything I had to say, and even wrote down every instance of getting outrageously sick that I told her about from this year so far (and that is no small number, people).

She did a basic skin allergy test, which wasn't any where near as bad as I'd thought it was going to be. In case you didn't know: there's no needles involved. They use these blunt-tipped plastic things that have the oils of different possible allergens (gluten, eggs, diary, peanut...) on the ends. They stick them on your skin and let the oils sit for 15 minutes.

While I was waiting I noticed a little bit of itching in one spot and thought for sure it would be gluten. But it wasn't. It was peanut. Now, I know you've never seen me eat, but trust me when I say that if I were allergic to peanuts I'd be dead a million times over with all the peanut butter/handfuls of peanuts/bunches of other things that are made in facilities where peanuts are present which I eat on a daily basis.

My doc said it's possible to get false positives, so she sent me for a blood test (three vials they needed) and is having me do something I have not been able to get the nerve up for yet: a 24 hour urine test. This means that after I had my blood taken at the lab, they handed be a giant orange bucket with a lid and a plastic urine catcher. Once I start I will have to collect my pee pee in the urine catcher and funnel it into the bucket and...AND PUT THE PEE BUCKET IN MY REFRIGERATOR AFTER EACH COLLECTION.

Yeah. It's 'bout to get real weird up in here.

I meant to start Monday, but didn't. I meant to start yesterday; I even cleared a wide berth in the fridge for the bucket and laid a towel down in that spot just in case. I totally did not start. I'm going to get it done and back to the lab before the week's out. This is almost as bad as when I went to the gastroenterologist and had to collect like 5 different stool samples for him to test. You guys? That was completely unpleasant. Except for the fact that I didn't have to refrigerate the samples. I guess poo stay fresh longer?

Honestly? Having blood drawn was easier!

What kind of strange medical tests have you had to endure?

Monday, August 15, 2011

Music Monday: Well, That's New



I know I'm not exactly flush with bad health over here, thank God, but it occurred to me just a few minutes ago that I used to be healthier.

I know what you're thinking, You've gotten older, Citygirl. This is what happens when people get older. Yeah, I'm older. But, fuck, I'm not old, you know?

On Saturday I noticed that the lymph node in my neck on the right side was swollen. Then, on Sunday I noticed that a muscle behind that lymph node was also swollen. Now, my neck and shoulders had been bugging me all week while trying to sleep and after waking up. I thought it was just my now-flat Walmart special $5 pillow that we just got last year. (Just how the fuck much do I need to spend to get a good pillow, anyway? Does anyone know?)

Now, though, I don't know. Clearly something is wrong in my neck-type area, but what? I called my doc today but she can't get me in until next Monday. I think I'll try HUBS' doc tomorrow to see if he can fit me in sooner.

Anyway. Did any of you catch the meteors this weekend? I woke up at 5 a.m. but it was disappointingly cloudy outside, so no shooting stars for me.

Well, enjoy these video selections from The Bird and the Bee. The above song has been one of my favorites for years, but I'd never seen the video until last week. Thank God for YouTube!

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