Tuesday, June 04, 2013

I Have A Wrinkle

Oh, boy. Here we go...

I know what you're thinking:

Why is this lunatic (You do know I'm a lunatic, right?) worried about one wrinkle? Isn't she almost 40? Fuck her!

Look, I understand how this sounds. It's not like I have NO wrinkles, but they are specific to the faces I make. So, when I laugh the laugh lines appear and when I'm not laughing they go away.

This wrinkle? This wrinkle is threatening to implant itself in my face and stay around no matter what I do with my facial skin.

I don't like this at all.

Why God, whhhyyyyyyy?! I'm too young for permanent face folds!!

The only reason I noticed it, is the giant zit I've had in between my eyebrows for the past week. I'm a little bit OCD, so I simply cannot leave a zit alone. I have to make it go away. Hence, I've been examining my between-brows area in detail for DAYS.

A couple of days ago I saw the weird line. What's that? I thought innocently. I pulled my forehead back, it was still there. I made my face expressionless, it was STILL there. Then I went the other way, I did this:

And there IT was! My permanent scowl/knit eyebrow wrinkle! Yeah! Aging is SO, SO AWESOME!

I mean, what the hell, people? I don't make this face on a regular basis. Maybe when I yawn. Maybe when I sneeze. I'm not doing any of that crap 24/7.

Is this what it's going to be like from now on? Everyday I'll wake up with a new wrinkle that makes no sense for my life, you know, just because?

I've been inundating the area with lotion and mild exfoliating treatments...No dice, y'all. It's STILL FUCKING THERE.

Oh, well. It's AGING or DEATH, right?

Also? Stay out of the sun:


CreateBalance said...

Funny...And so true...I have a few years on you, but once it starts it can't be easily turned around. Slowing the aging process starts on the inside with what we put into our bodies. And generall needs to start young.

As a side note, Yu have a good writing style with humor and wit, therefore, I would love to see a brighter happier photo of you on your blog....just a thot... :)

Susan Cooper said...

I try not to look to hard at the (inevitable) wrinkles... LOL. There is a certain comfort in denial. Bigger LOL. :-), Susan Cooper

JeriWB said...

Yep, I've decided that 35 is the age I want to remain, because 36 is finally making me feel and look older in ways I don't like when I look in the mirror. Here's to aging gracefully, NOT!

Cassandra Schmigotzki said...

That wrinkly tanned woman just looked so wrong!

I've actually decided not to worry about wrinkles or grey hairs. Wrinkles will come and I don't want to deal with all the stuff you have to do to stop them. As for the grey hairs they've started growing where I want them! I'm going to have stripes like the bride of Frankenstein!

Joanne McAlpine said...

LOL - I totally relate. My kids say to me, mom are you mad? I reply "No I'm just thinking" It's that damn scowl wrinkle. I also got into the bad habit of pulling up my cheeks in the mirror, then sigh. I'm starting to droop

Debra Yearwood said...

Too funny. I have to say I was a lot less freaked about my first wrinkle, but of course I got my first grey hair when I was 29, so really, by the time the wrinkles showed up... you learn to laugh.

Citygirl said...

CB: Thanks for the complements! I've thought about using a different photo, but I just like this one so much!

Susan: Denial does help, I'm sure. I'm not obsessing over the wrinkle like I was but it still stands out WAY more than I'd like it to!

Jeri: I think, so far, my best age was 31. I looked pretty good, I was traveling and trying lots of new things. Here's hoping I can get some of that spirit back even if I do turn into a sack of wrinkles!

Cassandra: Your thoughts on wrinkles are like my thoughts on losing weight - I don't want to deal with all the crap necessary to actually remove major pounds! By the way, I think having black/grey stripes would be kinda cool :)

Joanne: I understand "the droop" all too well. None of it's easy, is it?

Debra: I've got a few greys, but mine didn't start showing up until about four years ago. I guess I'm not freaked out about them since my mom says she started going grey at 16! Knowing I don't have it so bad helps!

Anonymous said...

Thank you for this post, absolutely pissed myself laughing.
I was feeling a little low today, but this perked me up.
I am watching those little lines take up residence on my face and not particularly liking it either. And I hear you about the ones that don't come with a smile. Those ones I like, they say something about how you have lived (hopefully with lots of laughter). The others do not say anything they are a waste of space on my face :)

Citygirl said...

Becc: I hear you about the useless wrinkles! But, all we can do is try to take care of ourselves and not freak out (too much) over the stuff we can't control!

Glad I was able to make you laugh :)


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