I broke out like gang busters the first two and a half weeks of this year. I made lists and plans and scheduled my days and got an article published on another website.
Then, last Wednesday hit. And I had a little panic attack over all the alerts that kept ringing on my phone telling me I needed to do this, that or the other thing. I managed to work on an essay I want to get published a bit on Friday, but that's been it.
I am in full avoidance mode.
Obviously, this isn't on purpose. I want to still be moving full-steam ahead. Instead, I spent over an hour on Twitter this afternoon. Since I was sick on Monday and had to really fight off a panic attack yesterday, I'm going to give myself a bit of a break on this.
I'll admit it, I almost had a full-on freak out about not getting more done. Luckily, before it took over I realized something:
ALL CHANGES THAT MATTER WILL BE HARD. I WILL FALTER FROM TIME TO TIME. GETTING BACK ON TRACK BY TRYING AGAIN IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING.
We get so wrapped up (especially around the beginning of the year) in changing, doing, growing and moving that we tend to forget that the biggest part of change is forgiveness of self when we get discouraged and trying to keep going when we don't feel like it.
Why is this so hard to remember? A lot of us make plans for doing things differently, have a setback and then say fuck it and go back to business as usual. At least, I know I do.
I'm working on GETTING UP AGAIN WITHOUT PUTTING MYSELF DOWN FOR FALLING IN THE FIRST PLACE. So should you.
We're only human.
Change is hard.
We'll make mistakes.
Give yourself a break.
Keep trying.
What do you try to keep in mind when you have a setback?
8 comments:
I think we all feel this at times. At least I hope so cause I know I feel it too. Sometimes it just helps to purge yourself of it all so you can start refreshed again. Purging for me means spending some time just writing it all out of my head so I can move on to the things I would rather be doing.
You're right, Jon. Writing it out of my head is basically what I did with this post!
I try to keep in mind that things happen for a reason. I also try to remember that the answer isn't always no, just not right now, not always easy, but I try!
~Kelly
Nice post Citygirl.Each day I try to be the best of me and some days I fail but its ok. http://herculesinheels.wordpress.com
Jane x
It's also tough, when you don't realize that you are saying f*ck it, but your actions and your intensity have regressed. Been there. There a little bit right now. I guess the key is to always be present or at least, take some time to reflect and then move forward.
You couldn't have said it better! I find I'm too hard on myself in general with all my goals and lists. When things don't go as quickly as I'd like, I get frustrated and start to shut down. Then I tell myself that slow and steady progress has marked my life's course, and then I'm able to chill and get back on track.
Well I have to ways of thinking about life. For day to day shit, I believe you just keep it moving.
When shit gets really heavy I remind myself of what Winston Churchhill said, "If you find yourself going through hell, keep going."
They are the same thing, but for me, when hell hits sometimes I want to curl up and quit, and I remember always keep going. Why stop and settle down in hell.
Jenn
Kelly: "Not right now." Yes!
JFO: Trying your best is the important part.
Johnny: I know what you mean, I'm there right now, too! Analyzing what's stopping me is a bit of forward motion in itself.
Jeri: I know the shutting down move all too well! Slow and steady usually wins the race.
MsJ: I'd forgotten that quote! I love it! Don't settle down in hell, people!
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