Music Monday: I Will Not Be One Of Those People!

Well, welcome back to everyone who enjoyed a Thanksgiving break last week. Ours was pretty mundane; HUBS, PT and I went off to his parents' house to eat, talk and eat some more. I was surprised my mom came along, she's always invited to their various holiday celebrations, but has only gone once. She found out she would have a four day weekend, though, and it changed her mind.

Remember how I told you about my birthday last week? And how old I was feeling? Well, I've really got a lot of work to do now. I do not want to be one of those old people who takes medicine day and night, spends all their time at the doctor or who looks and feels older than they are. Aside from the birthday, the thing that's brought this on is my stupid sinus infection. I had to get another round of meds from the doctor, know what? If I count the vitamins I take, I know have seven daily rounds of health additives.

Um...I'm only 38! That's too many pills and sprays and gummy chews and oils for someone who's not even fucking 40 yet!

I cannot wait to be over this infection so I can go back to preventative medicine. While that will help me not feel so old, I also need a serious attitude adjustment. I know you're only as old as you feel, so I need to keep my mind and body active enough to slow the atrophying.

I'm declaring it here and now: I REFUSE TO AGE WITHOUT A GLORIOUS, FUN-FILLED FIGHT.


There! Take that, body and bad, depressive attitude!

Now, let's get pumped!









How do you keep feeling young?

Music Monday: It's An Oven Out There

I did something I never usually do this weekend: I wandered around in the elements on two consecutive hot as hell days. I know! We met HUBS' family in Hermann at a winery for lunch on Saturday and ended up hanging out in town a little, visiting the house his maternal grandparents used to live in and stopping by their graves at the cemetery.

Sunday we went to a breakfast buffet at a Greek place called Ari's. It came highly recommended by St. Louis Magazine, and while it was cheap ($6.95 a person!) it was also not quite as good as IHOP. The food was pretty basic and got cold quickly, which was ironic, since the restaurant was as hot and stuffy as hell on fire. The problem? They had an omelet bar set up in the tiny bar along with the buffet with all the chafing dishes. Sorry, Greeks, that's too much fire in a small space that's also crowded with people on a boiling hot day!

Frequently, you really do get what you pay for. We won't be going back.

Sunday wasn't all so-so. We also got some much needed shopping done and finally got to see Chronicle*, a sleeper hit that came out earlier this year. It's relatively short and absolutely worth your time; it's a stunningly original take on something we've seen a lot of in the past dozen or so years.

Well, what did you do this weekend? Were you able to stay cool and relaxed? I ended up with a heat rash and certainly hope you were able to avoid that!

Now! Music!







*p.s. I disagree with the review I linked to that the ending was overkill. I loved the whole movie. Wish I had written it.

Music Monday: Happy Mother's Day!

Miller and a kitten in my bass drum.

I know I have to apologize for 'radio silence' a lot on this blog, but I want you all to know that I really do appreciate your reading, viewing, commenting and following. As much as I love the internet and blogging, I frequently need tech breaks to clear my head, watch a movie or, I don't know, read or some shit.

Did all the mothers and people with mothers they like enjoy Sunday's holiday? I certainly hope you did! HUBS and I took my mom out for BBQ at our absolute favorite place, Pappy's Smokehouse. We only spent 35 bucks and got a shit-ton of food! I love that!

PT had never been to this place before, but she really liked her food. We all ended up with leftovers, which is beyond awesome. HUBS and I were tired from some ghetto-living drama the night before so we only stayed at her place about an hour after getting back from dinner. (Some dork knuckle on the street behind us decided to fire off a shot gun. Not cool dork knuckle. Not cool at all.)

I regret that I left my mom's modest gift at home. You know how you mean to grab stuff on the way out the door, but manage to forget anyway? That's what happened. I got her a book and some supplies she can use in the computer class she's been taking, I figure I can take them to her this week, though.

In other news, Luanne was supposed to have her feeding tube taken out today. But, she got sick yesterday and didn't appear to eat or drink anything. She was really lethargic yesterday and today, though she did eat this morning when I brought food to her. So, we'll see. If you believe in praying for sick cats to get better, I'd love it if you could put a good word in for our little Luanne cat.

That's all for now. Enjoy this Sade video from the early '90s that has nothing to do with motherhood! Woooo!!!

Valentine's Day Is For Shopping

Well, I hope everyone had a good (much warmer) weekend and a great Valentine's Day. HUBS and I spent Saturday with our parents to celebrate his 40th birthday. By the middle of last week HUBS was fine with the big day, but before that it was pretty clear he was having a time with the idea of turning 40.

HUBS and I both have that thing where we were good kids who did well in school, and it seemed like a given that we'd do amazing things with our careers. Instead, we've both had a lot of missteps and setbacks and neither of us is completely where we thought/hoped we'd be. I was worried that HUBS wouldn't be able to get beyond those feelings, and I'm really, really glad that he finally did.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HUBS! I LOVE YOU!!


Valentine's Day was nice in what can only be described as the least romantic ways possible. HUBS and I ate lunch at a Mexican chain we love, Qdoba, because they were offering BOGO entrees when you kiss at the register. We had our good, cheap meal on an unseasonably warm day and then ran around to Walmart and various grocery stores to fully supply ourselves for the coming lean times.

Having full cabinets and a full fridge gives me (and most people, I'm sure) a sense of peace you cannot believe. It's more important than V Day gifts, but I did get HUBS a combo birthday/Valentine's gift of a new video game. Last night he brought me a large size of my favorite coffee and a pink rose. Good stuff.



Yeah, my rose is in a beer bottle. Deal with my non-traditionalism!

Music Monday! Three Day Weekend Edition

I hope everyone got a chance to enjoy their holiday weekend. Ours was a bit less relaxing than we'd hoped.

HUBS had two huge projects at work on Friday and I went in to help him. Everything went smoothly until about 10 p.m., when some software issues prevented him from finishing either project that was so close to being done. My poor guy did everything he could think of to solve the problems, but we ended up leaving at 2 a.m. Saturday morning with neither completed. Naturally, HUBS was infuriated.

As is always the case when one of us is angry beyond belief and the other is cool as cucumber, I tried to calm him down, but this was just one of those times when he had to come down on his own. Since there's no overtime budget left for this school year, HUBS had spent 16 hours at work that day, but only been paid for half that.



Saturday was nice; his parents came by and took us to dinner, and we did some furniture shopping (but no buying) afterwards and on Sunday.

Can I just mention that I've also spent the past four days trying to poo? I did everything right: drinking water, eating live-active-culture yogurt, having veggies in my scrambled eggs (spinach, onion and tomato), feasting on oatmeal for breakfast, having coffee... And yet, nothing worked until Sunday night when I stuffed my face with dulce de leche, pound cake and half a bag of kettle corn. I followed all the rules and what my body really needed was junk food? Travesty...

Today has been fairly quiet. I updated my resumes and applied for a writing job I found online, finished going through my emails and catching up on some financial articles I'd saved. HUBS has been continuing his unwinding process with liberal doses of video gaming. I really don't understand the video game thing, but I'm glad he's got a hobby.

How did you spend your long weekend?

Where Them Lights At?

Thank You Wild Lights at the St. Louis Zoo. Thank you. I hear The Baby Jesus loved him some twinkle...

I don't know if this is because we live in a still slightly ghetto neighborhood, or what, but I'm gonna need to see more Christmas lights next year.

Has anyone else noticed either a dearth of lights this season, or (more disturbingly) people not plugging their stuff in past the actual day of Christmas? Hey, people! It's holiday time up in here! If the lights are already up and the tree is still hanging out in the corner, how hard is it to plug that shit in? At least through New Year's Eve! I mean, really! Do you hate The Baby Jesus, or what?

Merry Merry, And All That

Luanne, Tux, Shakes, HUBS and citygirl wish you all a wild, wonderful, white Merry Christmas!

How'd That Happen?

Saturday is Christmas. Which means next Saturday is 2011. How in the fuck did that happen already? I'm pretty sure I'm still 12 and hoping to stop getting zits within the next year...Right? No? What do you mean by that, exactly?

Oh, you mean I'm 36 and still have one Christmas gift to buy and about eight others to wrap? Dammit...

Well, you know how my mom and I were trying to figure out what to cook for Christmas dinner, since we've both decided we're tired of the stuff we've been making twice every year since 1994? We finally made a decision; we're not cooking. Nothing "special" anyway. No cooked-all-night dressing. No sweet potato pies. And I can honestly say I won't miss it.

The thing that'll really be odd, though, is that since we're looking at a combo of frozen rain and snow starting early on Friday, I likely won't be going to my mom's for Christmas Eve. That will be the first time, literally in my entire life, that I won't be with my mom the day before Christmas. She told me yesterday that she thinks I should just stay at home if the weather is bad, but I already feel neglectful.

And? And! I'm having end-of-year/beginning-of-year anxiety. I can never really find a good way to get myself to get things done. (Important, advance my station/happiness in life things. Not laundry type things; I do that shit all the time.)

I make To-Do lists, and do you know what happens? I do the stuff that doesn't scare me, every time. The really important things always get pushed back because they're not so easy and they freak me out and I'd rather avoid them. Even though I know avoidance has always gotten me nowhere.

Wow! I did not mean to be a downer when I started on this post. Apologies. Now enjoy a little levity via 1967...

Didn't That Go Too Fast?

Well, I hope everyone had a truly wonderful, restful, celebratory end of 2009/beginning of 2010. What did you do, internet? Here's what HUBS and I have been up to:



As you know I got a job during the second week of December. We went out for sushi the following week to celebrate at Miso, a place in a relatively chi chi area known as Clayton. It was SO. FREAKING. GOOD. Unfortunately, my job ended last Monday. They ran out of work so all the new temps were put on "standby" for whenever they get more work in again. I feel kinda good that I actually got an extra day's pay out of them, though. See, the previous Friday they had told everyone else not to come in Monday, but since I'd worked hard enough to get put in the mail room I didn't hear that announcement and came in. They did need me in the mail room, so I worked a day more than the other temps. The mail room supervisor told me that as soon as they got more stuff in they'd call me. Until then, I've been applying for everything else I can. So, it sucks but I don't feel horrible about it.



Look at that first picture. Those, my friends, are homemade - from absolute scratch - biscuits that I made on Christmas morning. HUBS and I were supposed to leave for the 2 hour trip to his folks that morning, but they postponed the festivities until Saturday because of the insane amount of snow and ice they were getting on Christmas day.

Suddenly our day was leisurely and filled with free time. I was hit with a biscuit craving and we didn't have any of the frozen ones I like, so I got off my ass and made some from scratch. Yay! They got a bit crispy on the bottom on account of me never having made biscuits before and rolling them out a bit too thin, but I did a pretty good job with them. I even used Christmas cookie cutters to make them festive. I'm so damn cool.

I got a lot done between C Eve and C Morning. You can see the fruits of the night before in the second shot. I made dough ornaments for HUBS' parents as our gift to them. I got these fancy cookie cutters from Williams-Sonoma to cut them and then used some glitter glue to decorate. I ended up with about 18 ornaments total. And, they really liked the gift.

Here's where things get interesting. The weekend after Christmas our furnace reached its last leg. So, for a week now we've been living in below-normal-temps-for-the-inside-of-a-house conditions. We bit the bullet and bought a new one on New Year's Eve. Luckily we got 6 months same-as-cash financing so we have no payments on it until the end of that period. Before that time's up we'll get a small loan to pay the thing off. Also, since it's way more efficient than our old one we'll get a nice tax credit and save some money on our monthly bill and they're installing it right now. YAY!!!



Also on New Year's Eve, we bought this car right here. Except our red is a deeper, metallic red. I know this seems like an impractical thing to do on only one income, but HUBS' lease was up on his car and he managed to get a brand new, safer, cooler one for only about $20 a month more. Again we bought at just the right time, we got a no payments for three months deal. That's right, you guys, for three months we can use that money to pay off some bills. YESSSS!!!

After picking up the car we went to dinner (less than $10 for both of us; I am silly with coupons!) and a movie (yup, I had coupons for that too). I was even wearing makeup! All day! And I do admit I felt quite spiffy.

I have to say, I'm feeling pretty good and overall productive right now. I've realized that I feel too overwhelmed when I take on projects in big blocks of time. So, I'm doing things more "here and there" now. Instead of look-for-work-look-for-work-look-for-work for hours on end I look for jobs for a bit and then work on a freelance story a bit and then goof off a bit and so on. It's my first day working like this officially, but so far, so good.

Tell me your Christmas and New Year's stories!

I Am Very Inconsistent

I've had that thing happen again where some bad stuff happened and I wanted to write about it, but just couldn't. So, I didn't write at all for a month and a day. Here's what's been going on...

1) July 4th started out fine, HUBS and I went to review a bar/club for my $100 a week job and the food and drinks were good. We were planning to go see fireworks later that night. It was a nice afternoon...Until we pulled up to our house.

A smallish orange cat (who looked a lot like the 5 to 8 other smallish orange cats we have around here)was laying in the street near our neighbor's SUV. I parked as fast as I could, jumping out and running over to him (it was a him, I checked). Someone had hit him and just kept going. I picked him up and tried to make him move, we were planning to get him to the emergency clinic, but he was already gone.


Here lies Oliver...

I then stood in front of our house, holding the smallish, dead orange cat and cried for about 20 minutes. HUBS finally got me to put him down and went to get a shovel so we could bury him. While HUBS dug I thought of a name for the little guy, Oliver. We buried him under our flower bed in the back, and I cried for probably a total of three hours. Someone hit him, and just left him in the street...

Needless to say that ruined our 4th of July. We tried to watch fireworks later, but left the house too late to get any kind of good spot. That pissed me off even more. For about a week after this sadness we tried in earnest to get another cat from the Humane Society but couldn't decide between two of them (luckily one got adopted), and then we ran out of money anyway. Which leads me to #2.

2) By July 14 it was pretty clear that we were totally out of money. I used up the last of my unemployment extension at the end of June and my $100/week gig doesn't exactly help cover much. HUBS moved all our bills (even the mortgage and my student loan - which I've never been late on in the 12 years I've been paying it) to his next pay day. I suspended our savings deductions and transferred what little was in there to pay bills. Then I made a really hard decision: I went to my mom for money. Again.


We suck.

P.T. helped us out in April with a huge loan that kept us afloat for about 6 weeks. Right after she gave us that money (literally a day later) she got laid off herself. She kept telling me that she was ok financially, so I took a chance and called her and asked her for anything she could help with. I immediately regretted it and felt like a stupid child. I'm a married woman who's been on her own for 11 years and twice in just a few months I've had to ask my mother for money.

She gave us another huge loan, enough so that we could pay things a couple days late instead of 10. I went to pick the money up after doing something that may help me get a job. Hence, #3.

3) The unemployment offices have free job workshops that I've completely neglected the entire time I've been jobless. I finally decided to go to the resume and interviewing workshops on the 14th and 15th of this month. What did I find out? My resume, which I thought was pretty good, was a total piece of crap.

Why? Two reasons...a) I had too many types of things on there (reception/admin stuff, film/entertainment stuff and writing/photography stuff), which made me look like I didn't know what I wanted instead of looking multi-talented and well-rounded and b) I hadn't listed any accomplishments in my jobs.



Now, I'd heard of this "accomplishment" thing, but I hated my receptionist/admin work so hard that it was difficult for me to think in terms of doing anything in those positions that could be labeled as such. It took me a week after the workshop to finally redo my resume, and once I started thinking, it wasn't so hard. The lady who ran the seminars actually looked it over (I decided to start with dreaded recep/admin work since it is what I've done the most of) and approved it.

It's been a few days since then, I haven't used it to apply anywhere. What the fuck is wrong with me, you say? I'm scared. Scared that even now that I have the perfect resume I still won't be able to get a job.

I'm not just inconsistent, I'm monumentally fucked up.

4) I've also applied for another UE extension. I should find out this week if I've gotten it. Cross your finger for me people. And if you pray, please do that too.

Easter Sunday

To my absolute horror.

I hope everyone out there who celebrates Easter had a good one this year. Especially since mine kinda sucked.

I was up early, trying to get some things done before HUBS and I had to leave for the two hour trip to his folks in mid-Missouri. I could have sworn we should have some cash in our account left over from his last paycheck. I looked at our account. Not only did we not have anything left over, there wasn't enough to cover all our bills until his next pay day.

We'd be about $400 short. Having already paid some of last months bills with one of my credit cards I felt absolutely desperate and panicked. I called the only person I could think to: my mom.

I called on the pretense of only wishing her a Happy Easter, just so I could back out of asking for money if I needed to. She asked how I was and I broke down. I told her about not getting unemployment for the past 6 weeks and that we had no money to pay our bills and that we've been living off my credit cards and that we never have money for groceries. Stuff I had been avoiding telling her because I was hoping it would get better; hoping it wouldn't come to this.

PT told me it would be ok and to stop crying. She asked how much I needed and I told her. She said to calm down and come over.

I didn't feel like putting on clothes, but I knew this unplanned trip would make us late for HUBS' parents, so I did. HUBS was still in bed, I told him I was running to my mom's, kissed him quickly and left. I cried most of the way there.

PT hugged me when I got there. And, I started crying again. Shit, it was days ago now and I'm crying again thinking about the fact that I'm 34 and married and had to ask my mom for money.

She gave us far more than the 400 bucks I asked for. I protested, but took it anyway when she kept counting money out to me. PT tried to cheer me up by telling me that everybody goes through hard times and that right now this is just what I need to deal with. She also revealed that she was without a job for 2 years in the '70s. I figure this was when she was still at home with my grandmother but basically grown.

I thanked PT a lot and left about a half hour after getting there. I cried on the way home, then put a large portion of the cash in the bank.

All of this is a long way of saying that my Easter felt totally fucked. I then had to go to HUBS' family and pretend to be happy that Jesus was risen and I was with his folks, even though all I wanted to do was scream and curl up into a little ball and cry myself tired.